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Each week receive exciting news, tips, articles and advice on how to be the successful person you've always wanted to be.
"Self Improvement Front Line" will guide you along the path to achieving all your goals in life with regular sections on all the important facets of your personal development.
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Newsletter 016
In "Self Improvement Front Line" this week:
* How Friendships Can Help Your Personal Development
* 12 Secrets to Developing Self Esteem
* 5 Simple Tips For Beating The Blues
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How Friendships Can Help Your Personal Development
One of my great pleasures in life is reading. I especially
enjoy historical dramas, autobiographies, and humor. But I
also regularly read inspirational and motivational books to
ensure I continue my personal development.
One such book I read in the past was the well-known best
seller, "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale
Carnegie. Even if you don't do a great deal of reading this
is one book I would recommend to you for the simple reason
that in order to develop as a person and achieve what you want
in life you need to get on well with other people.
At the beginning of the book Carnegie recommends that you say
to yourself over and over, "My popularity, my happiness, and
sense of worth depend to no small extent upon my skill in
dealing with people." It's well worth taking note of.
The book goes on to give advice in four sections on; handling
people; making people like you; winning people to your way of
thinking; and being a leader without giving offence or causing
resentment. Each section ends by defining the key principles
for success.
Now I'm not going to repeat them verbatim here but in my
experience the keys to having successful relationships and
benefiting from them are:
- Show a genuine interest in people by asking them questions
rather than just talking about yourself. Get them talking
by using questions that begin with "who", "where", "why",
"what", "when", and "how".
- Listen carefully and act upon what you learn.
- Focus on people's positive qualities and give praise where
it is due.
- Avoid getting into arguments and don't criticise, condemn
or complain.
- Offer to help where and when you can and equally don't be
afraid to ask for help or advice yourself.
- And always be honest and sincere. Don't try to be something
you are not and don't give false flattery.
There is much you can learn in "How to Win Friends and
Influence People" that will benefit you as you progress
through life. Creating genuine and meaningful friendships will
help you to realise your goals and assist you in developing as
a confident person. It can be a key factor in growing your
self esteem, something you can learn more about in the article
that follows.
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12 Secrets to Developing Self Esteem
By Peter Murphy
Developing self esteem is a need that we all feel in varying
degrees.Some people always seem to feel that they are on top of
the world while others always feel kinda blue. How does one
develop good self esteem?
1. The first thing you have to learn is that you should seek
approval from within, not from other people. When you were a
child, it was only natural that you seek the approval of your
parents and other adults in your family. But now that you are
an adult, you should learn to get approval from your own self.
2. To get approval from yourself, you first have to know what
it is you need in life. This means knowing what you need
yourself, not what other people say you need. You will find
that there will always be many people who will want to dictate
to you what you should go after in life. To be able to secure
self-approval, you have to know what you want and go after it,
so that when you succeed you will genuinely feel self-approval.
3. Do not blame yourself when things outside your control go
awry.Honest self-approval comes when you acknowledge that there
are some things that you just cannot determine.
4. On the other hand, do not underestimate your talents. A
person with low self-esteem will feel that he cannot accomplish
many things when in fact he is quite talented. If you have the
right amount of self-esteem, you will definitely go far in life.
5. Do you think you have a more deep-seated problem
contributing to your feelings of low self-esteem? Maybe you need
a counselor or psychologist to help you through this. Some of us
need a little support from other people to regain our sense of
self-worth.
6. Find out who you really are. This means determining what you
really stand for, and what your value system is (according to
you, not according to what other people say you should believe
in.) When you know who you really are, it will be harder for
other people to bring you down.
7. Take responsibility for the choices you make in life. This
is the way to real happiness. When you acknowledge that you are
the one who creates your own future, you will be in a better
position to reach for your life goals.
8. Write down the things that make you feel worried on a piece
of paper. Then take another look at them. You will find that
many of the things that worry you are really quite minor things
in reality.
9. Learn to recognize that success often comes when you try to
address your failures. Solutions crop up when you least expect
it. So think of failure as an opportunity to try again with
another solution until you get it right.
10. One big mistake many people make is to compete with other
people. In life, you are not competing with other people; on
the contrary, you are actually trying to beat your own record
in whatever project you undertake. You are only as good as your
last performance.
11. Be willing to take risks. People with low self esteem always
seem to think that they will fail so they lose their nerve
pursuing new endeavors. On the other hand, people with high self
esteem prefer to be risk takers - and you know what? Most of the
time, risk taking pays off for them. And when you succeed at
being a risk taker, you help build your self esteem bit by bit.
12. Practice positive thinking. There are many historical
figures who have proven that positive thinking is a great
attitude to have to boost your self esteem. Success is based
on positive thinking, followed by positive doing.
Developing self esteem is easier than you think. Hopefully,
these steps will help you in your attempts at developing self
esteem.
Peter Murphy is a peak performance expert. He recently produced
a very popular free report: 10 Simple Steps to Developing
Communication Confidence. This report reveals the secret
strategies all high achievers use to communicate with charm
and impact. Apply now because it is available for a limited
time only at:
http://www.howtotalkwithconfidence.com/report.htm
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5 Simple Tips For Beating The Blues
You know something, even though I write and advise on methods
and techniques for self improvement, I still get those days
when everything seems to go wrong. The weather's miserable, my
computer crashes, the people I need to speak to are never
available, and I feel pretty lousy anyway.
Sound familiar? Well don't beat yourself up about it because
it really can affect us all. It's only when you let these
things control you and they start to constantly play on your
mind that problems occur and stress can be the outcome.
The key to beating it is to know how to deal with it and to
have a plan of what to do. You need to have some simple things
that will get you back on track and although you may think of
your own, and really you should, here are five simple tips that
might help:
- Take a break. Even in the work environment you should be able
to grab 10 or 15 minutes to yourself to just relax and think
about something good.
- Remind yourself of the good things. Focus on what it is in
your life that makes you happy.Even try writing down all that
you have that is good, both material items and your own skills,
abilities, and achievements.
- Get some exercise. Just going for a walk for 15 minutes will
help.
- Don't bottle it up. It's perfectly OK to have emotions so
don't be afraid to let them out.
- Treat yourself. Do something entirely selfish that is
designed for your pleasure alone.
Just be sure to have a positive mindset so that even when you
are faced with the bad day blues your mind will kick in and
ensure that you are still in control.
That way you just know that tomorrow is going to be great!
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